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Guaranteed for life? Whose life and how long - Albia Newspapers: Opinion

Guaranteed for life? Whose life and how long

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Posted: Friday, June 30, 2017 10:06 am

OLD FAITHFUL - our refrigerator-freezer - gave up the ghost last week. Its collapse was pretty much system-wide: the ice dispenser kept on dispensing, long after the glass had enough. The eggs froze. Frozen things melted, refrigerated things froze. Its message was clear; time to replace.

Our outrage was immediate. Our records showed that Old Faithful had been part of our life for less than seven years. Earlier experience showed that repairing it was only a temporary solution. We’d already been down that road, and it was expensive and only a short-time problem solution

Since the available space for the new appliance was limited, Jim took measurements, and we headed east to the appliance store.

It’s an enormous building, with acres and acres of new and shiny stoves, dishwashers, mattresses, garden supplies and who-knows-what-else. We found the refrigerator department, and looked over the choices.

And there were choices. Side by sides, freezers upper or lower, freezer-only chests - dimensions varied, so we were glad Jim had measured; even half an inch difference in height would have disqualified a particular model. Our previous brand was not even considered. We each had preferences, but after a civilized argument, we agreed on a Korean model with a metallic finish. It will be delivered today (Thursday) after we’ve spent the morning sorting, dumping and emptying our former friend.

Another discussion went on at the same time: Are things really made now to last a shorter time? The soon-to-be-discarded fridge was less than seven years old. Worth mentioning: we also own two other working refrigerators, placed in the basement and garage (summer only - familiarly known as the “beer crisper”). They no longer have ice-makers, but otherwise, are just putting along, for extra food storage. And they’re both much older than the one we’re jettisoning.

I don’t know what the expected “life” of these appliances should be, but I suspect in real time it would be less than you expect.

This gives new significance to a “lifetime guarantee.” Whose “lifetime”? Mine, or Great-grandbaby Lili, or the manufacturers’ realistic estimate of how soon they’ll be able to sell you a new whatever?

TELEVISION ADVERTISERS have a reputation for directing their commercials toward prospective buyers at the time of its airing. Sounds reasonable. Advertisers are looking for buyers.

So, I’ve noticed that TV ads during my viewing time - after supper - tend heavily toward automobiles: the likes of Mercedes-Benz, Alfa Romeo or Jaguar. Bluntly, purchase of these vehicles does not fit unto a ramen noodle budget. Someone else must be watching and buying.

Another advertising trend I’ve noticed: viewers are urged to “get the (insurance/flooring/medical care) you deserve.” I wonder how one gets on the “deserve” list.

Then some day, “Janet, here’s how to get that Alfa Romeo you so richly deserve.” But I won’t hold my breath.

PRESIDENT TRUMP has a new and unexpected (to me) supporter: Alan Dershowitz.

Dershowitz is a retired Harvard Law professor, Constitutional authority, noted and respected attorney, and Democrat. He has also been a CNN contributor, although that may have changed; he doesn‘t follow CNN on their Trump baiting.

In a recent TV interview, Dershowitz firmly stated that President Trump is absolutely correct, and has done nothing that is outside the Constitution.

With the Democrats, Progressives, media and some GOP leaders and members arrayed against him, Alan Dershowitz is a powerful addition to President Trump’s defense. Or actually. that he needs no defense, because he’s right.

Alan Dershowitz is my new hero.

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